Obituary: Dolly Gillen – a life devoted to caring for others

Dolly Gillen, Cullionbeg, Mullingar, passed on to her eternal reward on Friday June 24, 2022. Dolly was born on April 16, 1930 and was the eldest of eight children. She spent her early years at her family home at Dernacross near Drumlish in County Longford.

She lived at Cullionbeg with her husband Tommy from 1956 until his death on November 16, 2020. Dolly and Tommy were a typical couple of their time, and one was rarely seen without the other.

They were a united couple who shared similar interests. They worked hard all of their lives, but they always made time to help others and to spend quality time with their family.

Both were psychiatric nurses and worked for many years at St Loman’s Hospital, Mullingar, where they were held in the highest regard by all who worked with them, and especially by the patients they cared for.

Dolly retired from nursing in 1956 as the Marriage Bar that was in place at that time required her to do. For the next 24 years she devoted herself to raising her sons and supporting Tommy in every way that she could.

By 1971, as the Marriage Bar had been lifted and as her children had to a great degree been reared, Dolly returned to nursing. She worked from 1971 until 1981 in the Sacred Heart Hospital at Ballinderry, Mullingar.

It was during that period that she met and got to know her great friend, Fr Patrick Moore. It was fitting that Fr Moore was the last person that Dolly saw before her death.

In 1982, she secured a post in St Loman’s Hospital, where she worked until July 1994, when both she and Tommy retired on the occasion of Tommy’s 65th birthday.

Throughout her life, Dolly had an involvement in caring for others. Her mother became ill early in 1947 and Dolly, who was at that stage working in London, returned home to care for her parents and her younger brothers and sisters.

Dolly’s mother died in October 1948 and Dolly spent the next five years at home in Longford helping her father to rear her sisters and brothers, run the house and working on the family farm.

The most obvious example of her caring nature was her devotion to caring for her children and her love for her beloved husband, Tommy.

Dolly was enterprising, industrious and hard-working. Times were tough in the ’50s and ’60s and as a young mother Dolly did extraordinary things to ensure that her children wanted for nothing.

She was skilful and thrifty too. She made clothes for her boys, and always had them turned out in the best of attire. She knitted jumpers, mended trousers, kept a spotless house, inside and outside.

She baked bread, made jam, cooked tarts, reared turf and did all the painting and decorating.

Taking all of that into account and keeping in mind that she had four young boys to look after, you could say that her workload was more than enough to keep any woman busy.

Dolly made huge sacrifices for her family, and she was ambitious, driven and determined. In the mid-60s she persuaded Tommy to let her start rearing pigs so that she could contribute towards the cost of running the family home by earning extra money.

Dolly helped with the building of the sheds in which the pigs were kept. She grew her pig numbers from 10 to more than 130 within a few years.

As Tommy was a full-time psychiatric nurse, it fell to Dolly to feed the pigs and clean out the sheds on most days.

Later she sowed cabbage and potatoes and sold them to shops in Mullingar.

To say that she was doing the work of 10 men might not be an exaggeration.

Dolly was proud of being married to Tommy Gillen. She always made certain that he was well turned out. People often commented on how straight and tall Tommy was and mentioned how well he was always dressed – however, not many people were aware that Tommy was not fond of going shopping, which is a common enough affliction among menfolk, and so it fell to Dolly to shop for all of his clothes.

The first time she went to buy trousers for him, the salesman, who was very experienced, asked her what size Tommy was. Dolly was not sure and hazarded a guess, saying that she thought he was a 40-inch leg and that he was a 40-inch waist.

The salesman laughed and said to her: ‘Well he must have grown an awful lot since Mass last Sunday.’

In a short article, it is not possible to do full justice to any mother’s efforts. Dolly did everything that she could for her family and was highly respected. She was popular with her work colleagues and with a wide circle of friends and acquaintances.

Dolly was a woman of great faith. She maintained that faith and constantly gave thanks for the fact that she was able to remain living at home with the support of a caring and loving team of medical professionals and her extended family.

Although she suffered from osteoporosis and was often in pain, Dolly never complained, and rather than pray for relief from her pain, she prayed for those who cared for her.

The thing that Dolly was most proud of and for which she regularly gave thanks for were her daughters-in-law and grandchildren. Dolly was only able to remain living at Cullionbeg because of the efforts of her daughters-in-law and the love of her grandchildren.

It was fitting that her grandchildren were able to contribute to the degree that they did at her funeral Mass on Saturday June 25. That Mass was a wonderful celebration of a life well lived.

Dolly was granted a ‘short knock’ as the saying goes. She slipped in the shower on June 17 and cracked some ribs, and within a week she slipped away peacefully into eternity at 4.50am on June 24.

Couples like Tommy and Dolly Gillen leave an indelible impression and legacy behind them. Both had a deep faith. They mostly prayed for others. They prayed at exam times and they prayed for all the things that parents want for their children.