Poems by Deirdre Bigley

Joy

Joy does not arrive on fanfare

No guilt-edged invitation announces its arrival

It does not wait on a standing ovation

nor limit its visits for fear of outstaying its welcome

It has no expectation of hushed tones

nor your best China

or smells of fresh paint

or indeed a fresh baked sponge cake

Trumpets need not sound

nor children shushed to be quiet

It does not wait till the crowd has gathered

and never expects a rooftop bus

Rather

It’s there without you even knowing

leaking into your everyday

It’s In the song of the dawn chorus

and the cool comfort of a summer duvet

It’s the smell of a fresh morning brew

and on the piece of toast that for once does not fall butter side down

It tip-toes in on a freshly ironed shirt

and floats on the melody of your favourite song playing on the radio

It’s in the scent of freshly cut grass

and in the colourful blaze of blossoms at the bottom of the garden

It’s green lights the whole way to work

and in the kind welcome words of a friend,

In fact, joy does not arrive on fanfare for it actually never leaves

it just wait for you to notice it!

Maths is so rude

Maths is so rude, it arrives without knocking,

carrying a ruler like it’s going to be needed not to mention a set square and a protractor! Whatever the hell for? Beats me!

While Old Maths sits skulking in the corner,

wearing chalk dust and confidence,

saying, “We just did the sums. No one asked why.”

Just then New Maths slides in with a beaming grin carrying over a luminating slideshow,

asking me to explain my feelings around the numbers,

while wanting three different strategies and a diagram that looks suspiciously like a Picasso masterpiece

The circumference of my patience is measured testily yet carefully,

using a formula I once knew

before a calculator replaced my memory

along with my self-esteem.

Arithmetic on the other hand starts simple,

then quietly invites its friends along

Multiplication shows up early,

insisting everything is repeated

whether you like it or not while Division, along with its twin - the long type leaves us all in pieces.

All the while Compound interest lurks in the background,

smiling politely,

turning small mistakes into lifelong commitments,

like a loan that never forgets your birthday and where rather than getting a present you end up paying for everything.

Old Maths suddenly shouts up “You got it wrong.”

New Maths sneers, “Interesting approach", they just argue about the tone however horrifyingly both agree the answer is still wrong! Duh!

In the end, Maths closes its notebook,

leaving me with a headache,

and somehow manages to keep the score knowing exactly

how many of them I deserve.

Deirdre Bigley is a member of Inklings Writing Group, who meet on Tuesdays at 11am in the Annebrook House Hotel. Mullingar. Aspiring writers welcome – where maths is few and joy is much.